Sex Talks: Help! My Kid’s The Town Crier!

Talking to our kids about sex is challenging – for everyone, even me! You feel anxious about all kinds of things like their loss of innocence, or telling everyone and their cousin. You worry they’ll go out and try it or will think that by talking to them you’re giving them permission to do it. You worry about what other parents (and your parents!) will think if you talk to your kid at a young age.

But, you’re feeling great! You whacked up the ginger and read ALL of Robie Harris and Michael Emberley’s “It’s SO Amazing!” book about how babies are made to your 8 year old. She was a little grossed out, had some questions and seemed to understand how sex works. Whew! You are on your way to some great conversations.

You even remembered to tell her “This is a private conversation we have in our family and not with other kids or adults. Other moms and dads want to be the ones to tell their kids about this important part of life. You can always talk to me about it if you have questions or concerns.” Super! You rock!

And then…your lovely child heads straight to her best friend at school and fills her in on all the details! And then you get a call from the friends’ outraged parents and maybe even the school. Not a great moment in sex education history, but not to worry, all is not lost.

Consider this – You’ll probably spend 10 or 15 minutes on the phone with the upset parent explaining your beliefs about sex and kids and that you asked your daughter not to talk to other kids about this. You will apologize, tell them that you’ll remind her of this and then offer the parent a resource for getting more info about talking to kids.

Now consider this – You want to have open and consistent conversations with your child about sexuality, love and relationships throughout her youth, right? This is the most important part of this scenario – your relationship with your child.

When you compare the two, which is more important? The freaked out adult who now is forced into having a conversation they should be having anyway? Or your child who knows you are a trustworthy resource and will look to you for help and support for years to come?

When you start these conversations with your children I strongly recommend you tell the parents of her closest buddies, your parents and any other adult she has regular contact with. They need to know so they can step in if she starts blabbing, asks them questions or the like. It’s easier on everyone if they are prepared in advance for any little surprises.

When my son was about 3 or 4 we had read parts of “It’s SO Amazing.” He loved looking at the pictures of bodies and was very into reading this book. One day he was at my in-law’s house and he looked at my lovely mother-in-law and announced “You have a vagina!” She knew we’d been reading this book and took it in stride. We had prepared her for moments like this.

When it comes to talking to your kids about sex, you cannot worry about what the neighbors might think. The most important relationship is the one with your child. So take a deep breath, exhale, and get ready for the next conversation.

Pronunciation: Get Better In Another Language

Pronunciation can affect how we communicate. Many people, who have had a go at learning a foreign language, have experienced that sinking feeling when they try a well-constructed sentence in another language only to be met with a blank face.

Why is this?

Languages are built on sounds. If I speak English and live in an English-speaking country I expect a speaker to say sounds in a particular way. In French or Spanish I would expect to hear different sounds. When we can’t recognise the sound we try and adjust how we are listening, a bit like tuning a radio, but if we can’t guess the sound, the chances are we won’t understand what is being said.

The Blocks of Pronunciation

Pronunciation has two main aspects to it, physically producing it and the sound that is produced from it, the hearing of the sound. As we get older the ability to do both of these, i.e. physically work out how to make the sound and recognise it, can diminish. This doesn’t mean we can’t continue to learn new languages but we need some extra tricks to help us.

Let’s look at some ideas on what we can do when we learn a new language.

How am I saying it?

Try saying the letters. Notice how your mouth is working. If you don’t know how a sound is physically made you may find it harder to say it.

What sounds are the same?

English has many more sounds than other languages but it also has a lot of sounds in common with other languages. Good dictionaries in a new language will usually offer an English sound or word to compare with. Use it to check what sounds are similar.

Which sounds are hard to say?

Go through the alphabet of the new language and mark out the ones you find hard to say. Give them some attention. Try and physically make the sound and see how your mouth works. Say the alphabet. Look at how children use the alphabet song in English to help them remember the alphabet, doing the same in a new language will also help memorise the letters and sounds.

Read out loud.

Find some reading form your course book or any other book. There are two advantages here. One you get to say the letters and words. Secondly you get to practise sounds that you expect to hear and you become accustomed to the sounds of the language.

How good do I need to be?

There is much discussion on this. For many of us the ability to get by in other languages is good enough. If we can say what we want, simply, slowly and the person we are speaking to, can understand us, then our pronunciation is probably good enough. After that it is a matter of choice. Some people become very good at other languages and get to very good levels of pronunciation. Not many of us are such gifted linguists but there’s no reason why we can’t make the words so that people can understand us.

Things To Know About Real Estate Loans

Investing in real estate is quite expensive. Most people cannot afford to buy real estate with cash. With a real estate loan, the dream of your own property can be realized.

Many agencies such as banks, credit unions and lending companies offer real estate loans to those who can avail it. There are certain qualifications in order to qualify for a real estate loan.

Real estate loan is a loan on real estate usually secured by a legal document by which the owner transfers to the lender an interest in the real estate to secure the repayment of a debt or mortgage. There are two classifications of real estate loans: commercial and residential real estate loans.

In order to qualify for any of those two classifications of real estate loans the following are some of the requirements needed:

Commercial real estate loan:

Commercial real estate loan application form and real estate addendum.

Current business financial statements and most recent year tax return.

Guarantor’s current personal financial statement and most recent year personal tax return.

The applicant should sign the application form and the application materials should be submitted to the agency or institution where the applicant wants to apply for a commercial real estate loan.

Residential real estate loan:

Residential real estate loan application form.
Financial statement and most recent year income tax return.
Guarantor’s current personal financial statement and most recent year personal tax return.

In the same way as commercial real estate loans, the application materials for residential real estate loans should be submitted to the agency or institution where the applicant wants to apply for a residential real estate loan.

The materials needed for a real estate loan varies according to the requirements of different agencies and institutions.
Whn applying for a real estate loan, there are certain steps that the applicant should follow.

The following are the simple steps that an applicant should follow in order to hasten the processing of the real estate loan.

Select terms. Mortgage terms affect both interest rate and payment. With large amount of flexibility, lenders allow the applicant to tailor the loan to fit the budget needs.

Research the lender. In order for the applicant to save money, the easiest way to purchase real property in low rates is by finding the lowest costing loan. Research and find lenders who offer low cost loans.

Apply for real estate loan. After finding the right lender, the applicant can now apply for real estate loan accompanied with the requirements.

There are common mistakes when applying for a real estate loan. The following are some of it. To make the right impression and secure the loan, it is important to be aware of these common mistakes.
Not thoroughly researching the options. Thorough research on options should be made.

Not having the ducks in a row. Make sure that all the documentation the lender would expect is at hand and an applicant should be prepared to show why the property makes fiscal sense.

Failing to negotiate the best deal. Negotiation should be done to have the best deal.

Not selecting the best lawyer. Hiring the best lawyer is important. Hire lawyer that is very experienced in negotiating the types of real estates loans.

Going straight to a family lender. It is good to have a rapport with a lender, particularly when loan is needed. However, there are new real estate products offered constantly, ant it is worth the time to check out some of the other possibilities before going straight to favorite lender.

Knowing everything about real estate loans is very important when investing in real estate. Make sure you follow all the steps mentioned above.